You almost missed it, folks, tucked away in a small article on page 8 of the latest (n° 109) edition of “Actualité”, our spiritual guide’s favourite glossy…
“The announcement of a possible consecration next Spring of a Grand Lodge of Nigeria”
The Honorary Consul for Djibouti in Marseilles must be checking the diplomatic lists to see if there’s a possibility of adding another passport to his collection. Has he already phoned Big Moustache and CC (no, not Claudia Cardinale, the other one !!) to tell them to take their blue and gold aprons to the drycleaners and to give the baubles a rub over with Brasso ? What about the transport ? LML in English has not yet ascertained if the Nigerian president has a private jet. But that’s not a problem. Our favourite travelling trio have enough frequent flyer points with Air Bongo to more than cover the trip. What’s more, between lifetime appointed African leaders who just happen to be the Grand Masters of their nations’ Grand Lodges there’s such good camaraderie that Ali Bongo is sure to get an invitation. And could you think of anyone more qualified than our spiritual guide to do the Godfather bit ? He did it so well last year for Ali Bongo.
One slight problem ; they speak English in Nigeria. And that’s not really Stif’s strong suit. Here’s my chance. I’ve always dreamed of flying like the rich and famous, quaffing bubbly in the airport’s private VIP suite just prior to getting into the Rolls that whisks me over to a discreet part of the airport tarmac where my Falcon awaits me. Give me a nice title that starts with “Grand something or other”, a blue and gold apron, more medals than the chest of a soviet general and I’ll do the interpreter bit for our spiritual guide.
There could be another disappointing surprise for François. Nigeria is the principal source of those unsolicited letters or e-mails that promise to give you 40% of some multi-squillion sum if you’ll help the writer get the multi-squillions out of the country. Our spiritual guide has considerable experience in receiving unsolicited correspondence !! Once you’ve taken the bait they announce that you have to pay some legal fees (that serve no purpose in the end). Our spiritual guide knows a lot in that area as well. I reckon he’s a shoe-in.
Last but not least. You’re going to love it. The name of the Nigerian President, perhaps future Grand Master of the Grand Lodge of Nigeria …..Goodluck Jonathan !!
With all the troubles our spiritual guide has at present we think he could take a leaf out of the Nigerian president’s book and change his name to Goodluck, François !!